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  • Writer's pictureHall of Gains and Hypertrophy Podcast

HGH #28 - Relationships While Bodybuilding


00:00.00

christophknoll

Welcome back everybody we got a brand new episode for you guys Today. Christoph won't be joining Today. He has to rest up from an event. He had this weekend so he's going to be sleeping probably for a lot of today and resting his mind body and soul. So with that being said I got my wife joining us. Ah, so Paige this is ah the podcast podcast this is pae said I well I appreciate her joining because I think a good episode today. Um, that will definitely pertain to her and I as ah, bodybuilding while in a relationship or being in a relationship while bodybuilding. However, you wanted to look at it. There has been this notion for for many many decades all the way back in arls era where relationships can't last in bodybuilding and you shouldn't be with someone while you're bodybuilding and you should wait till you're done. You know x y and z um, but it's more and more prevalent today that we see relationships. Ah, within fitness industry within bodybuilding. Um, you know most pros that I can think of off the top of my head do have a girlfriend wife husband whatever it is um so it's it's definitely doable. A lot of a lot of male bodybuilders. They do take the time to. Focus on themself during it. Um I know plenty that are like that as well. Ah, they they wait until they're done. They wait until they can settle down um and kind of stop competing for them to you know, find someone and to start a family and start a life and everything with that family. But ah, that doesn't necessarily have to be the case for you just because.

01:35.80

christophknoll

You are bodybuilding just because you are focusing on yourself in the gym does not necessarily mean that you don't have the room for somebody else in your life. Ah, but the key thing is is that you need to find the right person. Ah you know I've been in the you know, lifting and training and all of that for for multiple years and years before I met my wife. And I knew that when I met Paige that this this passion of mine wasn't going to be a problem because I knew she was going to support me from the beginning and um I kind of set those expectations right away like look you know bodybuilding is inherently selfish and I'm sorry if you know anything comes across that. I'm trying to make it a priority or anything like that. But it's it's not to it's you can I've said it in different episodes. We can have multiple priorities. My wife is definitely one of my top priorities if not my top priority. Um, it's the reality it is um so ah. But bodybuding is also priority of mind too. It's it's what I do for myself. So you know I got my wife in dogs after that and then job and bodybuilding. Ultimately, so um, you can have multiple priorities. It's okay to balance that you don't have to have you know all of your your you know. Ah, eggs in 1 basket when it comes to how your life is structured so kind of want to talk today about um how we get through things and how we kind of structure. Um, you know hour days and hour weeks and stuff like that with me going to the gym for an hour hour and a half every day not to mention the meal plans and.

03:09.38

christophknoll

Um, you know work with my coach taint changing things up and you know anabolics and all of that how that affects me how that affects us and um, you know down the road once I start prep this summer most likely um how that's going to affect us and so kind of give you guys a um, you know more insightful view into. Ah, relationship within bodybuilding and you know maybe down the road we can reapproach this ah from ah you know, maybe a competition standpoint. You know what? it's like to be in our relationship while we are competing or while I'm competing and um, you know how my mental state is affecting us and. You know how my physical state is affecting us leading up to the show, especially for peak weeks. So um, with that being said, um, you know you've you've been with a bunch of ah you well not a bunch but like you've been with dirt bikers in the past and racers. Not a bunch. Yeah.

04:03.44

christophknoll

You've been with you've been with racers in the past and you know it's a similar passion where they focus on their their competition. So What do you?? How do you see it in your mind is it like how do you let it affect you I see it depends on who it is with you I feel like you do a good job with balancing. Ah gym and our home life. Our relaxation time I know that you try to go to the gym while I'm at work or a little bit. It might kind of flood into our home life but not a whole lot. Um. Guys that I've dated in the past it is not as simple as that. Um, but it really just kind of depends on the type of person you are and how much you want that relationship to work if it's not a very important relationship to you if it's a short term relationship. Of course you can be like Nope the gym is my number one priority you're on the back burner. And sometimes I do feel like that sometimes I do feel like that. But I would say ah 98% of the time I feel pretty important to you? Okay well I'm glad to hear that and you know that's my goal. Um, but I mean with with the schedule is there something that you don't like about. Me hitting the gym like what are the aspects of you know what? I do that You don't like the only one that really bothers me probably is the weekend and you have 1 rest day on the weekend and then the other day you normally go to the gym so that can kind of be annoying when I want to go do something.

05:35.22

christophknoll

Um, go to tjm Ma or I want to go see my parents. We kind of have to schedule everything around the gym and your meals That's really annoying. Um, but you hitting it during in the week doesn't really do doesn't really affect me any type of way because you're you go and then you come back by the time I get home.

05:54.86

christophknoll

Yeah I mean I try I try to do it when you're not home so that way when I'm done for the day you're done for the day as well. We can both relax and structure my meals around that as well. You know trying to make it so that when we are out doing things I'm not carrying too much food with me. You know I always got my lunchbox and and and my lunchbox yeah your lunchbox it was your lunchbox. now it's my lunchbox um you know carrying that lunchbox with me and having my water jug with me. You know, being that guy who was who always has a gallon jug with me. Um I always try to make it so that it's easier. It's not so much like there have been numerous times where you have taken chicken to T J Max and eaten it and the parking lot you had to rush me shopping so you get back into the car so that you can eat your chicken. Yeah because you're starving. Yeah, so that's frustrating sometimes um like if we want to talk about the downside of things that. A lot of things have to be structured around your mills and your gym times and like we don't go out to eat a lot with people because there's not a whole lot of things that you can eat out at restaurants and people want to go grab fast food and beer and we don't do that because. Doesn't really align with your priorities. So yeah I mean that's it's tough because it's like of course I want to enjoy those things with you guys. But I can still have a good time like we went to that brewery last weekend I can still have a good time with you guys just because I'm not drinking so um.

07:25.69

christophknoll

I mean it's also the the drinking aspect like you know also comes from you know my family and you know the addictive properties that my genetics probably really has dog tune on a toy really loud. Um, so. You know that's another reason why I do kind of stay away from alcohol. Um, there's a lot more that goes into alcohol than simply caloric intake or anything like that. Um especially being you know I talk very openly about my anabolics. Um, even people around us you know I don't. I don't want to hide anything from anybody and I don't want to set you know any weird expectations or anything like that. Um you know, especially with family like they know I'm on I'm on stuff. Um and it does affect me kind of you know I'm very blessed that anabolics in general don't affect me mentally too much. Um I know plenty of guys who. Ah, it really really gets them mentally and I know plenty of guys who really gets to them physically for the most part I don't have too much side effects from anything that I take but granted we also have a focus of less is more so I'm not taking too much to where it really does heighten everything. Um, so as far as like in quotations roid rage I don't really have much of it. Um, Wednesday was pretty was pretty rough so Wednesday I had a very rough day and the the icing on the cake because I popped mines higher.

08:53.30

christophknoll

And my main source of income right now is gig work for my car until I start my new Job. So um, that was a very hard day for me, especially being on what I am now which is ah um, primo and testosterone which I've talked about before and so it's.. It's not quite explosive Anger. It's more just like deep deep down like fucking like like a volcano like just lava just brewing on the inside. But for the most part I Express that anger and I get it out in the gym. That's why rest days are. Relatively hard for me to get through because a lot of my anger. A lot of my steam I blow I Blow off a lot of steam in the gym so that helps a lot. But um I was going to say we were talking about meals and all of that. Um.

09:49.87

christophknoll

There's something I was going to ask you right? after that I am drawing a blank now. But um, as far as like with with the topic of anabolics. How did you like? did you notice any immediate differences when I did start taking I think it was 2021 was my first cycle did you kind of notice anything right away. Or was it kind of the same for me. Maybe a little heightened here and there whatever what was it that was kind of different to be honest I don't remember any of that I have a pretty bad Temper myself. So don't think. I really paid too much attention to it I remember that one day you spilled your drink and you threw the paper towel across the room. Yeah, so this is very angrily yeah, very, that's my favorite memory of you? Yeah, yeah, that was my first like probably real like semi explosions in front of you. Yeah, you're very mild tempered and it takes a lot I did notice that when you were having the two rest days that you were more aggravated easily was that 2 in a row or was it. yeah okay yeah that you we're dying to get back into the gymm because yeah, just so frustrated at the world. Yeah, but and I would say like Wednesday I noticed that your tipper is it was rough I was I was very angry the whole day. Yes, um, but other than that I don't think I really notice. Okay, you're pretty even.

11:19.17

christophknoll

Even tempered. Yeah I do I'm not so I feel like you try to balance that out a little bit. Yeah I tried to ah, growing up for those that know me knew that I have I had a very bad temper growing up and I think a lot of it kind of stem from being cooped up in school all day I hated school middle school high school I hated all of it besides. You know I went to tech school so my shop I enjoyed my shop graphic design was every other week I was I was there the whole week. Um, so I did enjoy that but outside of that you know the academic side of things I couldn't stand it because I was just sitting cooped up all day from seven forty to 42 every single day. Um, and then. Coming home and like playing just call of duty and just like just heightened anger all the time. So my temper was really bad at 1 point. Um, but I think that's part of the reason why my temper is much better now is because I've had to I've had to really work on getting my Temper lower and. You know, getting that in a better place and I think the gym was a very very big key factor into fixing that. Um, so the the explosion that she's talking about the paper towel. There was one night I think I was like making you food and I was making me food and like. I think I like brought over a drink I think it was like a coke zero or something and it like itt. A isn't a cup and I think I spilled it or something and then I had to pick it back up and oh I put it on the tray I think and I put it down and it slipped because it's on the tray and then I think i.

12:50.45

christophknoll

But I cleaned up I came back and I put it back down and it slipped again and spilled and the paper towel that I was holding to clean the stuff up before I like like not really screamed but like I fucking yelled and then just whipped the paper towel across the room I was so angry because all I wanted to do. Just sit down and watch Tv and I had to get up like 3 times and clean the couch like to get the the coke out of it so that was very very frustrating but you'll always laugh every time it was so silly. It was very silly but it's it's still it's little shit like that that gets to me like all I want to do is fucking sit down you know. Like when I so Wednesday I was eating after the gym because I have to do doordash after the gym I was eating in the car driving to my first delivery and as I was eating I went to grab I think the fork but I grabbed the lip of the bull instead and accidentally flipped it so rice went all over my car. And so that was that was the first thing that made me upset I was really really angry but I was calm for the most part because I was like you know what I can clean this up and be fine. It'll just wipe right? off my pants. Whatever it's not like a liquid or something that like soaked me at least so it's a solid It's fine. It's dry. Whatever um. And then I was working for 2 hours that day I made twenty bucks and 2 hours so it was very slow day big waste of my time I could have been doing way better things with my time. Um and then on top of that when I was finally starting to get some orders in I hit a curb and pop my tire.

14:27.39

christophknoll

So that called it for the day. Not to mention it was raining. Um so to change my tire while it was raining so it was just a very very angry day for me. Um, so that was that was that was hard to get through and I told her I was like as I was getting home I was like this is the worst time for me to be on anabolics like like not like. Like we're we have a plan you know there's so it's a there's a reason I'm on what I am on right now but like within life itself. Not you know, being between jobs doing something I hate doing every day. This is a very hard time to be on on this shit. It really gets to me. Um, but with that being said. Um, I do remember what I was going to ask you so we're talking about like alcohol and going out to eat and stuff like that. Um something that a lot of guys don't take into account is that a lot of restaurants will serve stuff like chicken breast. They will serve stuff like steak. Um, when you. Potentially know you're going to be going out to somewhere to eat. Um for me I have steak and chicken every single day one meal of steak 3 meals of chicken now. Thank god I'm not at 5 meals a chicken anymore. Um, so when we go out I do plan on. You know I look at the menu ahead of time I look at. What is it? What's up sorry about that. There's somebody emptying stuff in the woods behind us so we just knew the dogs were gonna start barking. Um, so when you started to see like so what I was saying was.

16:01.96

christophknoll

If we're going out somewhere I almost always look at the the menu ahead of time figuring out what I'm going to get if I'm going to get anything um and kind of going from there. It was kind of weird at first to see that like you did it kind of throw you off be like. A little I'm super picky. So I also like to look at the menu prago places but I do remember always being like we need to go somewhere where Paul can get chicken and rice or Paul can get a plain steak or paul can get whatever. Yeah, so it's normally very tailored around. I mean what you can eat so that I think goes on the selfish side of things like my parents wanted to go to a seafood restaurant the other night and we couldn't go because it's on I can have shrimp. It's all fried. Okay, so we couldn't go plus everything is fried and so we ended up not going there. We went somewhere else. So that side of things sucks. But I mean I think but most of our friends and family. They know so they don't really pick anywhere like that and I I look when we go over to friend's house for dinner. They always ask what can Paul eat. Yeah, but can I make Paul. So that he can eat dinner with us because you're just so special that you have to have your own separate meal. It does it does show that we got good friends absolutely because they care and I goes back to if you know that you're with somebody and you make them a priority. They make you a priority.

17:33.39

christophknoll

Like you make me a priority so I don't pick things that you're going to be miserable at because you can't eat. You can't drink. Yeah or I don't ever plan anything where you missed a gym because that's a big. No. No yeah, but I mean when we do have plans I almost always adapt the gym around it I don't have to hit the gym. I mean during prepped I maybe be a little different situation like the last like 2 to three weeks maybe before a show I might actually need to hit the gym at a specific time every day but right now being in the offseason in Quotations. Um. It's not to the point where I have to hit the gym at five o'clock every day and I have to eat this meal at 3 then eat this meal 4 through then eat this meal at 7 you know. So if we have plans then I can adapt the gym around it and go at this time or this time. Whatever speed it up or you know. You know, like last weekend you know I had like a 40 minute chess day so that we can you know after the seminar so that I can come back shower and we can go out to that brewery that we went to so I can adapt it you know, accordingly? Um, but yeah I mean for the most part I mean most restaurants have some sort of chicken braster. Some sort of steak or something like that just plain wings or yeah, it's like a dry. Yeah somebody's always got something for the most part? Yeah, yeah, exactly it's it's very seldom. Do. We ever have to be like yeah I can't have anything at that restaurant and even then I'm cool like if we go to restaurant I can't have anything I can get like.

18:59.10

christophknoll

Ah, plain salad or something and like so that boring. Yeah, but I mean it's okay because I'm hanging out with people. You know I'm hanging out with you guys. It's enough for me. Um, so as far as you know that was that was a food and everything. Um, what do you think of like. My training like is there does it get frustrating when there's more cardio involved or like I come home sore and like complain about this or that or whatever like is there anything that the cardio is annoying sometimes when you have to do like fasted cardio or like an extra. Half hour whatever of cardio for a little bit. We were doing it together and we were like walking the dogs and that was really nice I hate the summertime so scratching that for the end. Um, yeah, that can be annoying most of the time you like got up and did fasa cardio before breakfast so it didn't really affect me because I was still asleep. But I know sometimes like you try to get done with the gym and you're done by the time I get home. But then you're like oh I got to do 30 minutes of cardio so that's an extra oh that was 5 minutes so you're not at home and I'm not with you? Yeah, so that side of things sucked. But. It's rare that you have to add on that amount of cardio and I don't feel like it's ever for like an extended period of time. Yeah I don't know why you have to do that. Well the cardio right now is just for health is just to keep my heart in a good place and.

20:30.19

christophknoll

You know, keep my blood pressure a good place because I am on what I'm on so de cardio because so for those listening cardio has a kind of 2 places within bodybuilding and 1 in 1 way. Cardio is very healthy for you. It's good to do cardio. There's this whole. Bullshit notion that you're going to lose muscle by doing cardio. It's not the reality. Um, but then cardio is also a tool that you can use to burn extra calories especially when you're prepping for a show. So right now. Um I'm doing cardio for health reasons. Um, but in the past when I've been cutting or doing a recomp. Cardio would be used partially as a way to lose a little bit of extra weight. Um, so when the the time that she was mentioned that was frustrating was the plan called for it goes four or five days a cardio a week um for a half hour but the but what I had to do was I had to have a meal between training and cardio and at the time I was working. Um, until about you know, 5 5 thirty. So I'd go to the gym come back. Eat. Go do cardio at at our apartment gym and then come back. So even though like I came back and saw her I still had to go do another half hour cardio which sucked more out of the day. It would have been better to essentially start cardio at the gym like I do now um than it would be to like it was it was better to do that than it is to um, have a meal between but the the plan essentially called for either facet cardio or cardio post workout after a meal.

22:02.37

christophknoll

Um, and facet cardio just was not happening I mean I can't stand facet cardio I'll do it if I have to but it's just I'm miserable I'm miserable when I'm doing it I have no energy. Um, obviously no food in my stomach. And obviously that's the point of facet cardio but I just can't stand it. So if I can avoid it I will and that was the option I went with and that they'd kind of weigh on us a little bit because um I was doing a lot of cardio during the week and you know I was doing it during the weekend at least so we had the weekend but during the week it was like I didn't actually sit down to relax until like eight thirty and then we go to bed for like 10 so I only really got to saw her for a little over an hour a day really? Um, so that was that was difficult. Um, cardio does weigh kind of. On us because the training is almost always the same I'm always there for like an hour. Maybe a little bit more and then I come home and I'm done but with with the cardio. It's way more added time you know half hour added adds up the shit adds up. So um, that can become difficult. Ah. So how how do you think it'll be because I think I'll be probably in prep by then so we got a trip in the middle of June to Florida so how do you think it's going to be with me in prep in Florida because the the couple years ago when I proposed to her we're in Florida and I brought my own food but I didn't end up eating a lot of it. Um I aim it.

23:29.24

christophknoll

Yeah I ate a lot of like chicken breasts stuff like that out rather than cooking my food I cooked all of it and just sat because we're going out to eat all the time. So this time around Florida I'm most likely going to be in prep I got to talk to my coach about it figure out what we can do. But um, how do you think that's going to be.

23:47.97

christophknoll

But that's being on it trip for me having to eat annoying chicken eyes and egg whites and all that shit annoying anger. Yeah, and I complain that it bothers me sometimes but it really doesn't have a whole lot to do with me I still get whatever I want I still get my ice cream I still get my Starbucks I still get my chick-fil-a like whatever. So doesn't have a whole lot to do with me but it is annoying I think the most annoying part of it is when you have to eat it? Yeah so like every few hours something. So if we're on the beach or if we're out and about and you're like oh I'm hungry I have to eat chicken right now. Yeah. Then that's annoying because it's like excuse me. We just had food 2 hours ago this is dumb every 2 3 hours yeah so that part's annoying more than like what you're eating I would say it's you're walking around a store and you're complaining that you're hungry. Yeah. Or I'm always hungry though or can you hurry up so because I need to go get some chickens. Yeah I don't try to hurry you though I just I know but I can see it in your face. Yeah because we'll brow hate for like ma anyways, but we'll browse for like an hour hou hour hou hour and a half and I'm like okay I kind of want to eat. I've been making you eat before we go. Yeah and that gives me a little more time. But yeah I think that's probably gonna be the most annoying thing is when you're eating but it doesn't really have anything to do with me per se I was it embarrassing it all. Um.

25:20.67

christophknoll

No because all of our friends know and who we're going to the beach with they know that you're like this and this is important to you? Yeah, so you get made fun of sometimes I get teased. Yeah, really I get tease. But it's off from love. Yeah, yeah, it's not malicious. It's we're a bunch of beer drinking chocolate ice cream loving country people and here you are with your chicken and rice and a gallon of water. Yeah, so you know way I guess it's not what is that embarrassing at all. And I will say like on the home side of things. It's nice, not to have to worry about cooking you dinner. Yeah, it is. It is a beautiful thing I you dinner I was talking to my friends about it and I'm like if I want to bowl cereal for dinner I can do that because I only have to feed myself. Yeah I don't have to cook paululse food I don't have to make Paul's food I don't have to worry about what he's eaten for. Breakfast lunch and dinner I worry about myself. So that's really nice because I hate trying to figure out what to cook for dinner. Yeah, and you know sometimes I will eat a hot pocket and go to bed and I couldn't do that if I was having to worry about what my husband was going to eat. Yeah I'm not one of those guys you that thinks that you need to cook me meal every night. I know but just if I was cooking for myself I would obviously just g over me? Yeah, right? but I can make a pot of spaghetti and that lasts me like four days yes I'm the only one eating it epic. So I'll say that's a good side of you eating your own stuff. Yeah.

26:57.23

christophknoll

But then but I will say that you were in my chocolate stash dig little bites here in there quite frequently. Yeah, it's my biggest weakness chocolate is my biggest week I will come home and there are fork marks in the ice cream. Container and little bite one bite but who eats ice cream with a fork it breaks it up easier now when it's frozen in there. It breaks it up easier a spoon like a normal human. But if it's like frozen and a spoons doll and it doesn't scoop you grab a fork because it's more pointy so you shouldn't just be eating it all. That true that's true I should yeah I should not be having any of it at all. Never but so I don't know what your people think that listen to you but I've told them that I take not here. He's not as strict. Yeah I'll take bites here and there he is when a crazy really important like when he was on keto he was super strict. That was hard that I hated yeah I hated that one a lot that really limited ah where we could go eat. We were in Massachusetts and we couldn't we couldn't do anything I didn't like.

28:08.95

christophknoll

Thanksgiving dinner. Yeah, we had Thanksgiving in December back with my family Massachusetts and I couldn't even have like anything no and we were worried about like what you could eat and we didn't want to like make too many good things because you couldn't have them and keto was I hated that one yeah was hard keto is hard. It's temporary though I knew it's like temporary I complained a lot about that one. Yeah I I mean it sucked. It was hard. It was hard. Um and I felt bad katumie good done. Um I felt bad being like that. But with keto. It's not like it's not like any other meal plan where. Like if you have an extra gram of carbs or like you have a bite of whatever it's not the end of the world with keto you literally cannot break ketosis if you do you start over and you have to go through four more days four or five more days of keto flu to get back. So I was not going to break keto flu or keto at all. Um. But also in the way it kind of did keep me strict because like I had no choice like there was nothing I could possibly have like extra chicken sure extra steak. Whatever extra egg whites sure but like any bit of carbs I could not have anything with carbs in it. I could not have ah net carbs that is so like you know if it had like sugar alcohols orritol stuff like that I could have it but um, like actual carbs sugar you know grain. Whatever it is I literally could not have it. It was not an option I could not break ketosis and also wait on you.

29:36.53

christophknoll

Mentally very heavily too because like when you're having something like Keto ah even on top of that also being like calorie strict too because we're trying to lose weight so we ended up breaking the plateau that I was in um, but. So I had to be relatively caloric caloric strict strict with what I was eating on top of the carbs. Um, it was very mentally draining because I was also training and doing cardio at the same time. So my energy was just not existent. Um training was tough because. Like Keto is is because you're burning more fat than carbs. You're not burning really carbs anymore. So you're burning what's called ketones which essentially if you want to look at it kind of like the building blocks of fat. Um, which we talked about before but. Um, when you're burning fat. It's more of a sustained energy. It's more endurance focused so with training especially weightlifting. It's explosive energy and that's where carbs comes in and that's why you see power lifters eating like sour you know or like ah gummy candies and stuff that digest very fast because they need that energy for that explosive energy. Ah, where with keto it's sustained energy. So it's fine for cardio. It's fine for running biking. Whatever it is but for training weights. It's like I'll do 10 reps for one set and the next set I'm like good for 4 reps. Let's let's end doing rows I'm good for 4 reps and all of a sudden. The fifth rep I can't even move.

31:04.15

christophknoll

It's the weirdest thing. It's not that I can't lift. It. It's that my energy is gone for that set. It's just gone. Um, so it's a very weird thing and it did affect us mentally because not only was I strict on carbs I was strict on everything else. So I couldn't there's really no food I could enjoy right? I couldn't have sauces I couldn't have anything like that. So. It was very hard to get through um mentally and there was a period where I was like telling my coach I'm like I don't know I don't know how long I can do this for like this is very very difficult. Um. If. We had like a show I was prepping for and I was on keto for the past couple weeks or like the last couple weeks leading up to the show. That's a different story because I have something to aim for but like we were just trying to lose weight we're like let's just see how much the weight we can lose or let's just see if we could break this plateau and that's kind of what the keto was and it was very hard for me to keep that. My eye on the prizes because there was no like actual physical thing to aim for um so that weight on me had very heavily mentally and like you were there for that when. So this is I got laid off for my job but January was a very good month for me with my previous job I did I did a lot of work for that for the company I was with and brought in a lot of deals I was in sales I brought a lot of deals which took a lot of time to build up but December I was really feeling like my head was under shopping block and it didn't end up happening at the end of January but.

32:29.27

christophknoll

That weigh it on us heavily I felt like you know I had like like a breakdown that one night you remember that and that December in December I forget what day it was. It might have been early January but it's like the stress just catches up to you. Um, and just like when you're strict on keto anybody who got covid and and lost. Sense of taste or smell you'll know what I'm talking about when you can't eat things you enjoy it sucks a lot of enjoyment out of life because like you don't realize how good food is and how much we enjoy food until you take it away and um with lack of carbs I was also lacking energy and. My favorite foods are all carb based so I was enjoying I wasn't enjoying any of my favorite foods. Um, so that was very difficult and it weighed on us definitely and the keto was hard but we finished it and I remember the relief that I had at least when I was like okay you texted me when I was at work. Or called me or something I was like great news I am done with this bullshit. Yeah I think it was like that day he was like I always do this new plan and then he added a shit ton of carbs like it came out of nowhere. It was like a ton. It was like like 150 grams out of nowhere. So that was great and now I'm on a carb cycle plan which is kind of interesting. Um I mean I know that doesn't really matter to you right now. My you don't even know what I eat really I don't yeah I was just sitting here thinking I was like I don't like is I support you and I love you and I want you to do great things in life. But.

34:03.00

christophknoll

I don't I don't know if it's because this is not like a passion for me like I it I've never really cared too much about going to the gym. Sorry I'm pouring some coffee and so. Listen to you when you talk about it and I kind of know what you do, but for the most part I I don't yeah and that's fine with me I don't know if it's fine with you but it doesn't matter to me it changes also pretty often too. Yeah, so I don't really ever know what you're on I don't really know what you're eating. Yeah I knew the keto thing because that changed it was a very big change but everything else I Just I know you go to the gym I need a bunch of chicken and that's fine with me. It does it really bother me. But yeah. Like I don't want to say like I don't care but it doesn't change anything. It doesn't yeah it it doesn't affect me that much. So It's like you do you boo? Yeah, you do you was a different one in the past you were with someone who was dirt biking was it bri more that was different because that is a strong. Passion for me like I Love that. So for those that don't know her family and herself are all dirt Bikers. You were a dirt Biker you were. Youre a kid and her brother is professional as Well. He's professional racer and G and CC so he does a lot of woods racing Essentially um and her father's the same way.

35:32.21

christophknoll

Um, and he works on bikes too. So Their whole life are evolved her on dirt bikes growing up so she was involved in that world and the person you were with before me was a racer right? Yeah, So it's it's like it's It's just like. If you're dating someone who's whole family's all bodybuilders like of course it's gonna be different for them when you're with them than somebody who has a different passion. So for for her. It's she's with So. What's funny is that when her and I met I'm so far Beyond What anybody you've ever been with? Oh yeah. Like as far as like differences like I'm from the North Um, as kind of a city boy. Um I go to the gym I don't touch dirt bikes I was actually at the time we met I had a street bike at a motorcycle. It's a kawasaki so I was a cement rider not a dirt rider. So like literally exact opposite of everything of every guy she's ever been with out on drink nothing like that. So very very different I don't even like country music I'm very I'm very opposite of a lot of you know their bikers you bet now if you want to talk about a problem we have in our relationship country music is hard. It's the fact that you don't listen to yes I know I know. But like on that rabbit hole. Yeah, and yeah, anyways, okay continue. Yeah I I respect the talent you know that I respect the talent. Yeah, but still I like and I want to listen to it on but it's just the problem that we have is that I.

37:00.13

christophknoll

And very emotionally attached to my music. So if I don't feel it listen country songs are like that but of a lot of the country music. We end up hearing is like it's not passion. There's no passion There's not there is. I don't I don't feel it anyways. Yeah, so it's it anyway. A different story I'm very old soul when it comes to music. My favorite genres are like jazz and blues and stuff so boring. Yeah, but there is a love for it. You know there's a love for it. Um, so when it came to to racers. It was more time consuming on my end. Yes, this bodybuilding doesn't consume my time. Yeah, it might be frustrating sometimes but dirt biking consumed every weekend of my life I had to go I was driving to Pennsylvania I was driving to New York I was driving to Louisiana it was it consumed a lot of my time and my money and that was tough even during the weekdays it was let's go practice here and let's go do this on a Tuesday and we can't do this It's race season. no weddings no funerals no birthday parties. No nothing. This bodybuilding is we can manipulate the schedule a little better to where if my god child is turning to we can push your.

38:27.27

christophknoll

Weightlifting schedule back a little by 4 hours and go to a birthday party I wasn't able to do that with anything else. So I also think that's why this doesn't bother me a lot because the last one bothered me I I didn't my life was that it was start bikes. It was him doing. It was him chasing his dream. This doesn't require a lot of me. It just requires me to not ditch about you going to the gym which I don't do and me that's a huge stuff. That's really yeah, red life for me like past relationships they'd ask me to not go to the gym and stuff and you don't I think I've asked you. Like once a handful of times in the three years we've it's the cardio that cardio when I was eating after meal I the time you're like can you not? Yeah I want to relax I missed you? Yeah, but that's tough those 10 I've maybe said it a couple times because like I want to go do something that but. Other than not I can anything I can see some of the frustration sometimes when I'm like oh I just got to hit the gym at some point like we get. We're making plans and I'm like just let me know what we're doing so that I can hit the gym. Yeah and like nothing can ever be an all day event and we can't do that which. It can be I just these know ahead of time and that's part of the problem is that a lot of people were around aren't necessarily planners and also it takes us a long time to drive to our people too. Yeah, so that takes a lot out of the day like when we're at my parents. You're like.

39:57.43

christophknoll

Checking your watch all right when are we leaving because I got to hit the gym and that and I got to roughly know how long I'm going to be there is I could pack the meals accordingly right? She never pack enough meals. But yeah I know had to go hungry for a little while usually again. That's some of the frustration I think I think one of the biggest things that's the difference with like you being with the racer versus you be with me is that I don't think like it's for what I do I don't think you'll ever be able to like it'd be very hard for you to understand. Like I can't quite explain like what it is to Me. You know what? I mean like because like when I'm posing or like you see bodybuilders or stuff you find it gross or weird that they're posing a certain way stuff, but it's like oh yeah, this is this This sport is silly to me. I Guess but also in that same aspect like I was talking to my girlfriends this morning at breakfast and my brother just broke his neck and they were like why would you ever want to do something like that. That's so dumb' it's an occupational hazard. So it's It's just because I don't have a connection to it. That I think that it's silly but durbugging a lot of people think it's silly. Why would you want to risk your life. Yeah I mean I can understand racing I watch racing an f one and all that So right? and not everybody's like that. Yeah so stand it. So I think it's silly but I also try to remind myself that he thinks some of the things I do.

41:28.73

christophknoll

Ah, silly like I don't get why you like Target or tg ma maybe it doesn't make I hope you have female listeners so they can chime in and be like we got about places are great about quarter of our listeners are female. So I hope they chime in and say she's correct. You need to go with her. Yeah, I'm not a big fan I'm not a big shopper I buy everything online really? So that's because your wife buys you everything from the store. Well yeah, you'll surprise me the shirts and stuff but like. And sure all of stuff I buy is like should we talk about the fact that you're growing out of your clothes like a teenage boy. Yeah I do grow out my clothes like crazy. So any female that wants to date. Yeah that's another problem too is that when you're in a relationship you got to keep but I mean not even just in a relationship but like when you're in bodybuilding you're going to you get to keep buying clothes. It is a pain over and over and over again. Yeah, like right now. What's happening right now. My waist is shrinking. But oh that's what happening right now. Longer pant. Yeah, you got eyes are so big that it's looking it makes him look like he has on high waters. Yeah, they pull up pulls up the pant and I'm sick of seeing his socks. Yeah, his faded black socks. So we I made him go shopping and I made him try pants on yeah and I up to size and then you were good. Yeah, you were like all these actually fit so I went from a 30 to 30.

42:56.35

christophknoll

So well 32 being the waist which usually have to wear a belt but I kind of f fluctuate my waist depending on what we're doing um usually I'm I'm around a 28 or 30 waist and I would like have to kind of wear a belt with my pants. Um, but now I'm a 32 32 which the thirty what the length. The in seam now the ins seam is thirty two inches ah we had to go up in the inseme because my my glutes quastas all of that was pulling up the pants because of gaining size so that was interesting a problem that I'm having right now is that. My lats and my memory. My rear doubts are growing so fast I'm I'm getting stretch marks and I'm starting to stretch out my shirts I've already up the size and shirts I'm a large but I'm getting to the point where some brands have to buy extra large but it's so silly because like an extra large will like swallow you whole everywhere else. Yeah, pitch your arms but it doesn't fit anywhere else. Yeah, so it's tough to find things that fit you correctly and like kind of you love um vanquish bank is just good but they're expensive right? and all your joggers are mediums and they're way too so way too snug. And where I bought to the largest you really group? what were largest and you put them on. They fit you perfectly. Yeah, but also I feel like it's a you thing because you were a pair of jeans the other day and you werere like or sweatpants and you said I just these are so baggy and they weren't they look like regular sweatpants but becauses. They're not.

44:28.80

christophknoll

Suction to your is the red joggers that I wore to the seminar but it's like because they're not They're not suction to your thh. Yeah you think that they look baggy and they don't yeah, they look like regular sweat handss. Yeah, but we got other issues with the jogres is not necessarily how tight they are. what I said they were a show no that's what they show and I don't realize it until I take a video and I'm like I can't fucking post that. Yeah, it's it's a problem sometimes but it's not if you would up your sizes. Yeah, anyways you but you get new pants every winter you get new shorts every summer constantly changing got new shirts pretty often the size of the shirt. Yeah, my sweatshirts gets like I know my dad's giving you a lot of old clothes that like are too small for him. Yeah, and they fit me right? Yeah, that is ah that is a problem. And know like before we got married you. We had to push back getting you size for your tucks. Yeah as class possible second. But yeah were scared that you weren't going to fit in it by the time the wedding rolled around. Yeah I like literally almost of the day waited as long as that possibly could. To to get size for my suit for our wedding because if I did it any sooner like a lot of my friends got sized so our our our wedding was in October um, three of my my friends who are bachelors or um groomsmen not bachelors throomsman um they were in my bachelor party groomsman. Um, they went.

45:58.00

christophknoll

And got sized in may ah when the wedding was in October then they picked it up when they were down here. Um, so they knew that they were going to be fine, but for me if I had measured myself in may um what would we do yeah I would have been swimming in my suit. because at the time in may I was like the heaviest I ever was you have to a lot of weight and yeah I was like 2 10 or something so come to thes when you proposed well yeah I did but in may of the next year when my friends got sized if I got sized at the same time when we got married I would have been swimming in the suit the measurement would have been off so I measured it about a month out and I was still kind of worried whether or not I was going to fit it properly because that's how often my size. Um, all is is altered because just because my weight might be the same doesn't necessarily mean my size is is different or the same. It's if you lose fat and gain muscle. You actually lose overall size because fat is lighter than than muscle. So if you lose a pound of fat. Ah, you shrink in size versus gaining upon a muscle. So um I was kind of worried going into our wedding whether or not it's going to fit my suit but ended up being fine I ended up fitting perfectly. Still um so that was pretty good but I close clothes can be annoying sometimes very yeah.

47:25.30

christophknoll

Ah, buy you, you get more close than I do half time. Yeah I mean you you shop her on tj ma and find me some and grab me a shirt pants and then you're like oh these don't fit I got to return these like for stuff that you buy for yourself. Whatever or like you don't like it or something you got to return it or something you know? Yeah, you got a lot of stuff here. Body changes a lot. Yeah that that does get it that does get annoying. Um, how do you think it's gonna be when I'm like a week or 2 out from my show this summer of I new wardrobe I guess well I'm saying like like energy wise because I know I'm gonna be like. Toast for like two weeks I don't know that it will change us that much I feel like I'm tired twenty four seven so I don't know that it would change us that much I think the thing that's going to suck the most is if it drained to you while we're on vacation I think I'm fine. Um, because we don't have a show plan. So we'd be so far out I don't think I'd be really that much less in calories than I am now because I'm kind of I'm literally like maintaining right now I'm like the exact same weight right now the past few weeks so we don't really need to cut out a little bit or maybe add a little bit of cardio and that'd be it. So. But most likely the training is what's going to suck. We're in Florida I think because I'm gonna have to plan when I train which yeah and I think last time you just went early before I got got up. Yeah when I get up a large it sucks for you. But again it doesn't have anything to do with me. So yeah, you're back by the time I got up.

48:57.29

christophknoll

Or I was still asleep. So yeah I got a plan ahead, gotta figure out what gym I'm going to and that's also annoying like we're looking at buying a house and he's like well we get by here because it's too far from a gym. And it sucks and I've told him I'm like I don't want to plan the rest of my life around where a gym is at. But so we're working on that it's hard it's hard to explain why? Yeah I've been to good gyms and I've been to shit gyms and. You have a good gym. You have more resources to make better progress. So if I'm going to a shit gym or driving super far for a gym and makes it much more difficult so that's why I'm like let's see what's near the area does but this is also not something you're gonna be doing until you're ninety I know. So I don't want to buy a house just because it's located near a gym but that seems very our first house most likely won't be our forever house but it might be I'm just saying but like we can't even look anywhere else because. Well, you're also working at a physical location now so we got to look within driving distance right? So just saying just another piece of the puzzle. Yeah, that could can be annoying sometimes if we just moved down to but also we moved here for a gym that you and your work.

50:27.60

christophknoll

And you have now swapped gyms 4 times was it for no I added elite I just now switched for the first time. No so you were going to two I was going to elite in golds the golds that. Was nearby here. You could you told goal you were like 10 minutes from work when we moved here and then I was like 10 minutes from the gym anyway, versus you' been a term since we moved here. Yeah I was going to elite for a bit and then I canceled that and then I started going to swappping between Lake Norman and the Huntersville Golds and then I stop that now I'm going to mega flex well mega flex my point is that we moved up here with you going to one gym and we are now not going to that gym anymore and we are on our third gym but take this into account the gym I go to now. Just open in June? Whatever so it wasn't here before and I wouldn't have gone start going there if we lived up here or we didn't live up here I wouldn't have start going there I only go there because we're here so something is a keep in mind. But yeah, so that's also is that's also problem is that we got to kind of. Plan the relatively plan the future around where Jim is located geographically to us as long as it's within like a half hour drive I think I'll be cool, but that's my like 1 requirement of a good gym that is you see I just want a nice house to raise a family in. Yeah.

52:00.12

christophknoll

And your requirement is that's my one thing is how far it's a gym. It's just ah within a half hour of a good gym and if we move north of here. We're fine. That's that's all and we'll be within driving distance of your work. So but yeah, so it'll be It'll be interesting when we go to. Actually buy a house this time next year yep got to find the right one so that'll be a task but um, as far as anything else is anything else. You wanted to touch on I think you kind of covered a little bit. Everything. Yeah but I mean ultimately. We can. We make it work and I think really the biggest thing is it's not even like you like you don't participate in it with me. So it's not about me sharing it with you. It's about me just. Getting support from you I think that's my big you would love to share it with me and I don't want to I mean yes, and no I mean if you like you don't have to like I would like to be in the same gym as you like if you were doing your thing and I was doing my thing parallel like yeah like you like we're both exercising at the same time that would be nice but I'm not going to. Like dont want to do people have asked like how I feel about you playing video games and this kind of goes with Adam like I love my knee time. Yeah I love being able to sell on the couch and watch what I want to watch with no guilt so call the gym that's great I can take a nap inside usually sleep when I'm at the gym I can watch a show.

53:29.40

christophknoll

I can go to Dji Max by myself. So it's kind of nice having that me time. Yeah, but I also think it's all in who you find yeah because not everybody's going to love me time and not everybody's going to want to fit their schedule around a gym. All on who yeah who you find that's kind of the gist of this whole thing is just finding the right person because if you find the wrong person. It's not going to work and obviously that's happened for me in the past. So but it also has a lot to do with you. You make sure that. When you come home from the gym. You ask me if you can cook me dinner or I'm going to make one of my rest dates on the weekend so that we can spend a whole day together that also has a lot to do with you as well kind of through the podcast wrench in there on Sundays. Yes, you did? Yeah no. But it gives me an outlet so I'm not talking your ear off because I was talking to you I still talk my ear off but not about the gym as much the gym I save a lot of the gym stuff for the podcast. So. It's not as bad as it was yeah and again it doesn't bother me I get to watch what I want on tv yeah, but. Um, yeah, so ultimately today I think it just comes down to finding the right person who supports what you do and supports your your bodybuilding journey I guess and especially like the the biggest thing because like the training in food that just comes down to communication. But I think when you're with someone.

55:00.18

christophknoll

Um, I think one of the biggest things to especially if you're going to be aiming for pro or aiming to really be um, a competitor like me is that ah you need to to be with someone who's okay with anabolics because not everybody is um, you know you tease me about. You know, shooting up my ass and whatnot. But um I don't think everybody would be okay with that because essentially I mean it is illegal essentially um, not that ah everybody anybody would ever come after me. But um, we hope I mean really me versus like a heroin user like. Who's the real problem here I'm only putting myself at risk not anybody else. So um, you got to find someone who's okay with that if that's a plan for you if it's already in your life I mean I don't recommend it to anybody. But if it's something that you plan on doing or something that's already in your life then you got to set those expectations properly. Um. You know you don't want to um, be like oh I'm just kind of like in the gym a little bit here and there and then all of a sudden they're spending the night and you're like they find you shooting up test in your dell or something and you're like what what? Yeah what the hell is going on like ah my dad's a cop like what are you doing like this is illegal like I'm not going to be around this. Um, so I think that that kind of you kind of need to set those expectations properly and um I kind of set that in the beginning ah like look this is my plan you know, um I plan on making pro. 1 days is something I want to do.

56:32.62

christophknoll

It does take time out of the day it it is inherently selfish because it is about me. It is very vain. Um, it's all about how I look very vain. Yeah, very vain. It's all about how I look um and there are things that come kind of attached to that. You know body dysmorphia stuff like that never being happy with how I look is kind of part of that and um, you kind of hear some sides of things like you know from that regardless of of how I look um you know if I have visible abs I'll still feel like I'm I'm Vet. You know there's more I can lose.. There's better I can get. So You know what the fuzzies thats it. Um, so you know that kind of comes attached to it. So I Think if you set the expectations properly making sure that you guys communicate and make sure that you know that she knows he knows whoever it is that. Um, it's not against anybody else and this is something you need to do for yourself and you know like I mentioned earlier. It's I can never fully explain what it feels like and what it's like to do this because it's just it's a passion of mine and you can't really ever fully explain explain a passion properly to someone who doesn't. She had the same passion as you I agree so it just comes out to support and being there for it and you know being the loudtest one in the crowd when I am competing that problem with that. Yeah, so that would be.

58:01.91

christophknoll

That'd be great. So again I want to say it is also on you to make sure that I feel like I'm enough of a priority well course that's my goal so as much as you want to try and find the right person. It still 50% of that weighs back on you. Yeah, and what you're doing to make it work. Yeah, it's not all on all this person doesn't support me. Well, what are you doing to make sure that she feels or he feels that support and that love when you are there. So yeah, you know how I am I can't It's not on just me to support you. You also have to hold up your end of the bargain. Yeah, and and you do that so I don't have an issue with it. Yeah there's this whole like with social media now. There's this whole like thing with with guys in the gyms like the giga chat kind of shit and like. Like Patrick Bateman stuff where it's like they like she has to like cater to me and that's not the reality. You know it's it's 100 % effort from both sides you know she supports me but I support her and I show her the love for supporting me, you know so it goes both ways. Um. And if there's something that she wants to do I'm um, um, all for it. So it's you know you're not the only one in a relationship so this is just one you know bodybuilding is one facet of something that we both need to work together. Um to support and if there's anything that.

59:33.37

christophknoll

You know she needs both of us to support for her then I'm all for it because you do it for me. So I just think that the toughest thing is we we keep pushing off shows and we haven't seen the full like actual result of all this effort I've put in yet. But I think that this the year that it will show that and make it pro. One day hopefully soon will um, really be the pinnacle of like okay I can I understand now why he's putting in all this effort and everything and you know hopefully one day you know working to the point where it could pay for itself. You know. Because the financial side of things does weigh heavily on us. But we get to the point where bodybuilding pays for itself. You know through endorsements or whatever if I can get to that point that'd be amazing. So make things easier but time will tell effort will tell and um, the plan will going forward the plan for me. Hopefully competing nationally this year and my place top 2 then that means a pro card and that's my that's my first step I'm really losing the baby fat and the stubborn fat is my biggest goal right now but getting into that pro card is what I've been working towards the past couple of years so with that being said. Thank you sweetie for joining. It's good to have this episode I think is a good one I I can't believe I didn't think of it before but um, I've told you before yeah, it's fine. Yeah, so Christoph's cooler than me but whatever christofph can join. We do the christoph and Paul thing but we have occasional solo sessions here.

01:01:06.52

christophknoll

Um, but you know future episodes will have you on. You know if you got some to contribute fun to say yeah a lot can use your brain. Um, but with that being said, thanks for listening guys tune in next week we should be back with Chris off next week um get this posted sometime today and thanks for listening. We'll see you guys later on bye. So yep.


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